 Introduction:
In
Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar", Caesar's
fellow senators conspired to assassinate him. They
convinced Brutus, Caesar's trusted friend, to join
them. Upon Caesar's return to Rome, the conspirators
stabbed their knives into him. At Brutus knife thrust,
Caesar uttered his famous last words: "Et tu
Brute? (Then fall, Caesar!)" "You too
Brutus?" In these few words, were the feelings
of shock, pain, anguish and betrayal.
Have you
ever felt the pain of being betrayed? How did it feel
to be stabbed at the back by someone you thought was
close to you? It hurts, doesn't it? What did you do
in such moments?
This morning
we will study Psalm 55 to see how David dealt with
his pain of betrayal. One characteristic of this
psalm is that the content is arranged in an
alternating way. So the thoughts may not go in a
certain sequence.
There are 66
books in the bible. It is said that in 65 of them,
God speaks to us. But the book of Psalms speaks for
us. It expresses for us our feelings of joy, sadness,
anguish and pain. During the next few weeks, we will
look at two more psalms.
Will you
please turn with me to Psalms 55..
I. God's word
affirms our painful emotions.
Let's look at some of David's
emotions.
1.
Internal pain vs1-5.
V2,"my thoughts trouble me and
I am distraught", v4,"my heart is anguish
within me; the terrors of death assail me", v5,
"fear and trembling have beset me; horror has
overwhelmed me." there is distraught, anguish,
fear of death and horror, i.e. the feeling of
insecurity. What a mixed bag of emotions. What inner
turmoil he was undergoing. One can certainly feel for
David.
2.External
hostility 10-11
Sometimes when our internal world
is tossed up and down, we'll try to go out and have a
change in scenery. V9-11, "...for I see violence
and strife in the city, day and night they prowl
about on its walls; malice and abuse are within it.
Destructive forces are at work in the city; threats
and lies never leave its streets." For David,
the outside world was not that friendly. It was
rather hostile. So, where did he turn to?
3.Desire
to escape 6-8,
"I said, 'Oh, that I had the
wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest.I
would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would
hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest
and storm.'" Here we see David wishing to just
get away, go to a desert, away from such inner
turmoil and external hostility. Go to a peaceful and
quiet place.
These words of escape appeared for
the first time here in the book of psalms. For David
to express such a desire is a reflection of the
intensity of his inner pain and confusion.
David's words must have expressed
some of our own painful emotions. What a comfort to
know that our pain is so eloquently, and without
condemnation, being expressed through the mouth of
David.
Our families maybe in trouble, like
a never ending saga. We are getting older and don't
have the energy to deal with them like we used to.
Our pain may come from our feeling of being
misunderstood or unaccepted by those who are
important to us. There are also the broken dreams and
promises. Some may be victims of physical,
psychological and emotional abuse. The pain within us
is beyond description. Our days are filled with tears
and sighs. All that is left within is a shattered
heart.
So we think of turning to the
people around us. Seeking love, understanding and
acceptance, but all we find is more misunderstanding
and criticism. We feel like a bruised reed,
candlelight about to go out. Oh, how we wish we had a
pair of wings that we can just fly away from it all.
Fly to a shelter with peace and quiet.
II. We
recognize the source of our intense pain.
In verses 1-8 we learn about David's
inner pain. Where did it come from? Who caused such
pain in his life?
Vs12, "If an enemy were
insulting me, I could endure it; if a foe were
raising himself against me, I could hide from him."
David had many enemies. For example, while he was
fleeing from Jerusalem, Shimei cursed him. But David
said, if an enemy was betraying or insulting me, it's
ok. This is what is expected of an enemy. We don't
expect loyalty and faithfulness. But listen to his
description of the one who betrayed him. Vs13, "but
it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close
friend, with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship as
we walked with the throng at the house of God."
Please note the progression of such a description: an
equal of his, a companion, a close friend, sweet
fellowship (good communication), and worshipped
together. A very close personal friend and with
religious ties. This made David's hurt so painful.
The closer a friend, the more pain we experience when
we are hurt and betrayed.
You shared some deep personal
secrets with a close friend and asked that he/she
keep to himself, but one week later, others know
about it.... Years ago you helped an organization
both emotionally and financially, now they turned
around and filed a lawsuit against you. Your
colleague or the principal investigator took your
data and published a paper without your name on it.
You thought you had a relationship with that person,
but found out that he had someone else in mind. Your
spouse of many years betrayed you by seeing another
person. A husband betrayed the wife's trust by
abusing her. The father betrayed the children's trust
by physically and sexually abusing them.
How painful this is. How hurting it
is when someone who is so close to us betrays us.
In the Singing Brook, a newly
published book of collection of poems, one poem reads,
"Once they cherished each other; once they
pledged their faithfulness. Now their dreams are
shattered, broken vows are scattered with broken
promises. Once they told each other "until death
shall make us part", now their bond is fraying
thin, suspicion fills each heart." It is like
this bruised reed. It is very painful, isn't it?
III. We
recognize that God is the ultimate revenger.
What do we do when we experience
such intensity of pain? Usually there are three
options:
First, take personal revenge. To
fight wrong with wrong. The Chinese have a saying,
"he who revenges not, is not a gentleman."
As we read Qing Yung's novel, its one revenge after
another. The book, "......" ends by leaving
the reader in suspense. Should Hu Fei kill the person
whom he thought killed his father. Should he revenge
or not? From the biblical perspective, personal
revenge is clearly forbidden. In Leviticus 19:18,
"Do not seek revenge..."
Second, blaming it all on self. Its
all my fault that he is treating me like this. If I
only tried harder, if only I am nicer to him, then I
would not have been betrayed. I must have done
something wrong for him/her to do something like this.
Not only do others hurt us; we are also hurting
ourselves. We become double victims. We are prone to
do this when we have a poor self-esteem.
Third, denying our feelings. No, I
shouldn't feel such anguish, fear, terror and horror.
Especially being a Christian I shouldn't feel this
way. How about David?
What did he do when he found
himself in such a desperate situation? Listen to
these words. Vs 9, "Confuse the wicked, O Lord,
confound their speech". This is a reference to
how God confused men's speech at the tower of Babel.
Vs15, "let death take my enemies by surprise,
let them go down alive to the grave,..." This is
a reference to the Korah family in Moses' days. Their
entire family was destroyed because of their
rebellion against Moses. Vs 23, "but you O God,
will bring down the wicked into the pit of corruption;
bloodthirsty and deceitful men will not live out half
their days." In Genesis, we learned that Abraham
died at a good old age. So the opposite is death at
half of his days. Do you notice what David was saying
here? He was wishing destruction and sudden death on
those who betrayed him. How cruel and venomous were
his words. How can David, a man after God's heart
spilled out such words.
But who was David talking to? He
was talking to God. He was telling God how he wished
God would destroy the one who betrayed him. You know
what, here David reminded us that God is the ultimate
revenger. In Deut 32:35, "It is mine to revenge;
I will repay." Throughout the bible, we learn
that God is the one who will bring about the final
judgment. He is the righteous and fair judge.
In the book of Revelation, we read
about the fall of Babylon. Babylon is a symbol of
evil. And in the end, God is victorious over her.
When we experience the pain
resulting from betrayal by someone close, its ok to
express our painful feelings. Its even ok to tell God
some of our ugly desires and wishes for the one who
had hurt us so deeply. But at the same time, remember,
God is the ultimate judge. In his own timing He will
bring justice into our lives and this world.
IV. We cast
our troubles to the Personal God.
Yes, we feel pain; we feel intense
pain. We appeal to God, appealing for his final and
ultimate justice. What else?
1. We
come to God.
In the midst of his personal and
inner pain, David came to God. In vs 1,2, "Listen
to my prayer, O God......hear me and answer me...."
He was pleading with God to listen to him, hear his
prayers, answer his prayers. This God is different
from other gods. We are not sure if other gods will
listen, hear and answer. We only wish they would. But
this God is different. Vs16,"But I call to God,
and the Lord saves me", vs 17, "I cry out
and he hears my distress", vs18, "he
ransomed me unharmed...." This is personal faith
in a personal God. So we too are to come to God in
our moments of distress, when we feel like that
bruised reed. He listens, hears and answers us.
2. We
cast our cares on God.
Vs 22, "cast your cares on the
Lord..." Cast means to throw out. When we were
in Michigan two weeks ago, Sean was learning how to
fish. He learned to cast a fishing line out. To throw
it out into the lake. What do we cast? Our cares.
Here it means our burdens, those unfair treatments.
The betrayal by someone who is close to us has become
a burden. Throw this to God. Why?
First, he will sustain us. You see,
by ourselves, we are unable to stand. He will make
sure that we will stand up. He will not let the
righteous fall. And this is why David was able to
write that beautiful psalm: the lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green
pastures,........." and then Peter in his old
age, encourage the 1st century believers: cast your
cares upon the lord.
Secondly, when we come to God, cast
our cares upon him, we will begin to look at things
differently. Remember at the beginning of this psalm
how anguished and distraught David was? He focused on
his own personal pains. But in v20, "my
companion attacks his friends; he violates his
covenant. His speck is smooth as butter, yet war is
in his heart; his words are more soothing than oil,
yet the are drawn swords." David was able to
look at his problem from a different perspective. Now
he was able to look at the offender. He was a
covenant breaker, a smooth talker, a hypocrite. He
was the one who had a problem.
Isn't it true that sometimes in our
painful experiences, we feel that we are the ones who
are wrong. I think of a woman who had been married
for 14 years. Her husband was a very controlling
person. He would not allow her to have any friends.
When she was sick, he would not let her see any
doctors. Explaining that its all in her head. For a
long time she thought she had a problem. Finally she
decided to move away. She then came to know the lord.
As she was experiencing physical and spiritual
healing, she began to realize that he was the one who
was sick, he had a problem.
When you feel you are betrayed,
when you feel all those pain inside you, when you
feel like a bruised reed, you need to come to the
Lord. Cast your burdens onto him, and you will begin
to see things differently. The person who betrayed
you has a problem. Not you.
Thirdly, this passage is not only a
description of David's pain resulting from the
betrayal, but it is also pointing us to the future.
You see, about 700 years later, Jesus came into the
world. He had 12 disciples whom he spent much of his
time with. They were his friend and companion. But
three years later, he was betrayed by one of them,
Judas, for 30 pieces of silver. One can imagine Jesus'
disappointment, hurt and maybe even anguish. Someone
who ate with him betrayed him. For this reason the
author of Hebrews wrote, "For we do not have a
high priest who is unable to sympathize with our
weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in
every way, just as we are, yet was without sin. Let
us then approach the throne of grace with confidence,
so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help
us in our time of need." (4:15-16). Jesus Christ
knows those painful feelings of betrayal. He
understands our hurts and anguish, for he had been
there. This is the reason we can come to him, to
receive mercy and grace to help us to go through
those dark moments in life.
Conclusion:
I trust that there are times in
your lives when you too would say as Julius Caesar
did, "Et tu Brute?" Someone close to you, a
good friend and maybe even a brother/sister in Christ
has betrayed you. This person violated your trust in
him. You may have been betrayed by your spouse of
many years. You are deeply hurt. The pain, anguish,
disappointment is beyond description. Your heart is
shattered; dreams broken and tears flow unceasingly.
Sometimes your external world may not be all that
friendly. People around you cannot understand you.
You feel like a double victim. How you wish you could
just fly away to a place of solitude. You feel like a
bruised reed, just one more push and you will break;
a flickering candle, just one more blow and you will
distinguish.
But here is the good news. Come to
God. He understands what you are going through. He
knows of all those hurting and anguish emotions. He
wants you to express them to him. He can take it. He
wants you to know that he is that ultimate avenger.
He will bring final justice into your life. He also
invites you to cast all your burdens to him and trust
him. For he will sustain you, give you the strength
you need to move on. Yes, you can still insist on
carrying your burdens, but how unnecessary it is. And
you know what? He will not break the bruised reed,
nor will he blow out the flickering light. Instead,
he will sustain and renew you.
Rev. William
Hsueh July 23, 2000
Houston Chinese Church, Houston, Texas
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