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撥雲見日顯同性

薛孔偉牧師

 

讀經經文:哥林多前書十三章十三節

13 現在常存的有信、望、愛這三樣,其中最大的是愛。

 

去年在我想這篇信息時,想到一位年輕人,為了自己的性別認同感覺到困擾,有很大的掙扎,他感覺到他是被同性所吸引,但是,他卻沒有進入同性的性行為,他不太曉得如何處理他心中的那種情緒,他覺得教會在對他的這件事情非常的沈默,然後將他和其他與他有類似情況的人,歸納成另一類的人,就像軍隊過去的政策:不問、不講。他感覺到在這個教會裡,他有一部份是隱蔽的。

我也想到有些人,有相似的掙扎,就被一些非常歡迎、溫暖的教會所吸引去了,在那裡遇到很多人與他們相同、相似的身份,在那裡的牧師們,甚至要給他們一個同性聯合的祝福。

當我們想到同性戀這個問題時,我們發現教會一方面為要堅持、持守真理及聖潔,就拒絕有同性傾向的人。或者有些教會走到另外一個異端,歡迎、鼓勵、慶祝這一個同性吸引的情況,然後說這是神所創造的,是件美好的事,所以要慶祝。所以,今天早上,要跟大家一起來探索,成為一個教會,個人如何一方面要擁抱住那個永不改變的真理。另外一方面也把神的恩惠、慈愛彰顯出來!

自從廿年前開始,我越來越感覺到,同性戀這一個話題,不是關於任何的事實、理論、科學證據,乃是有關人、真的人。我相信我們當中許多人,當您想到同性、同性戀的時候,您心理會浮現出一個面孔、或一個名字,不再是一個理論的問題。當我們討論這一個題目時,我會儘我所能對神的話語忠實、也要對人的狀況,有一個敏銳的心。

 

一、首先,我們先要知道一些基本的大前題,我們看到二個類別的前題。

•  第一個前題:我們對聖經的態度有關。在這一個類別裡面,有二個小點。
•  首先,當我們讀聖經任何一段經文時,需要知道作者的用意,並且,原先的聽眾所聽見的是什麼?然後我們就繼續的問,對我們今天來說有什麼意義?
•  第二,當我們談論不同的題目時,例如神的揀選、預定、墮胎、創造、離婚、同性戀問題等。首先我們要認清楚,聖經裡清楚說的是什麼?聖經裡沒有說的是什麼?譬如說,我們都知道神創造了天地,這是清楚的說明的,但是沒有細節告訴我們。在聖經裡清楚說的,我們要堅持、要守住,但是,聖經沒有說清楚的、聖經沈默的地方,我們要非常的小心不要隨便做結論。在討論時,要有空間,甚至要同意我們不同意的地方。
•  第二個的類別,是有關我們是誰?在這個的類別裡,我們有四點要注意:
•  首先,我們每一個人都是按著祂的、形像所造的人,我們要將人所做的與人的身份分開。在這樣一個前題下,沒有人能夠說他是同性戀的。所以不能說他是異性戀的人,雖然我們不一定喜歡同性戀的行為,但我們千萬不要將這一些有同性戀行為的人,將他非人格化。
•  第二、我們都是有性的人、有性別的,當神創造人的時候,祂造男、造女。天使是沒有性別的、無性的、或是中性的。但人不是,我們有性別,是男、是女、這是我們為人的基礎,除了這一點,是不是每一個人在這性方面都有某方面的傾向?我們不明白為什麼,因為這一方面是聖經相當的沈默。無論如何,我們都是有性的人。
•  第三、我們都是罪人,我們每個人都有每個人的軟弱,我們沒有一個人是沒有罪的。我們每個人性的每一部份都被罪所污染、每個人都帶著自己的破碎特點,我們也經常抗拒、克服我們的罪性。但是,我們沒有一個人完全克服了我們的罪性,如果我們對自己是完全誠實的話,是不是我們每個人,在神面前,我們都是在性方面都是罪人?我相信,當我們面對耶穌在情慾的教導,對保羅的書信裡情慾的教導,我相信我們當中沒有一個人能夠說,這些經文與我無關?因為我都克服了。我想沒有一個人吧!如一位哈佛教授這樣說:「我想大概在神的眼光中,我們每一個人在性方面都犯了錯誤。」因此,我們每個人都何等需要神的恩典。今天我們坐在這裡講這篇道、聽這篇道、或在網站看這篇道,沒有一個人帶著我比您更神聖的態度。從我開始,我們每一個人都要在神的面前承認我們的罪。
•  第四、我們都是在祂話語權柄之下。在曉士頓中國教會及其他很多教會,我們信仰基礎的一環,就是神的話語是我們信仰和生活那個最高的權威。
 
 二   我們要清楚聖經裡禁止的事

我們繼續來看神的話,聖經中有四段經文是提到有關同性行為的事,我們簡單來看:首先在創世記十三章,這裡講到所多瑪、蛾摩拉的人的罪、十八章廿節說神看見了他們的罪,就往下去查看,看看倒底是怎麼一回事?然後在十九章廿四、廿五節:「 當時,耶和華就使硫磺與火,從天上耶和華那裡降與所多瑪和蛾摩拉;把那些城和全平原,以及城中所有的居民,連地上生長的一切,都毀滅了。」這裡講到神的審判。所多瑪和蛾摩拉的罪是什麼?

十九章的第五節講到一件事情,講到神的使者來到所多瑪和蛾摩拉,進到羅得的家,居民就在門口說:「你把他們帶出來,等我們與他同房。」 同房這兩個字被翻譯成:「讓我們與他們親近。」從創世記的第四章那裡講到同房是有性關係。在猶大書的第七節,這裡講到像所多瑪和娥摩拉和周圍城市與他們一樣的淫亂、隨從反常的淫慾等等。這裡清楚的給我們看見一個圖畫, 所多瑪和蛾摩拉的罪,是同性的性行為。

第二段的經文,是在利未記裡,特別注意的是在十八章廿二節:「你不可與男人同睡交合,像與女人同睡交合一樣,這是可憎的事。」在利未記這一章和廿章這裡,都講到在神的話語裡,同性戀行為是神所禁止的。

然後我們再看一下保羅的書信。首先一定要看的是羅馬書第一章廿六、廿七節:「因此,神就任憑他們放縱可恥的情慾:他們的女人把原來的性的功能,變成違反自然的功能;同樣地,男人也捨棄了女人原來的性功能,彼此慾火攻心,男人與男人作出可恥的事。」在這一段經文裡,無論您用什麼樣的角度來解釋、從歷史的角度、從高等批評的角度、文化角度,沒有辦法避免這段經文所講的,就是講到同性戀的行為。同性的性行為,在聖經裡講得非常清楚,是禁止的。

最後,在哥林多前書、提摩太前書裡。我們特別看一下哥林多前書,因內容跟提摩太前書是差不多的,在這段的經文裡,保羅列出所犯的一些罪。在哥林多前書這裡說:「無論是行淫亂的、拜偶像的、姦淫的、作孌童的、親男色的、偷竊的、貪心的、酗酒的、辱罵人的或勒索的,都不能承受神的國。」這些都是人所犯的罪,而且在這些罪當中,同性戀這個行為或同性這個行為,在聖經裡清楚的被禁止的。當然在今天這個社會、時代裡,也有許多反論,用另外一個方式來解釋這段經文。因時間的原故,我沒有辦法一一說明他們的解釋是如何。但是我們對聖經解釋有一個非常基本的原則,就是要按著聖經最清楚的字面的意思。當我們講完了這一切,當然如上禮拜我們提到的,在神賜的婚姻制度裡,神清楚的講是「一男一女」。

 

三   •  我們要明白神的恩典

讓我繼續來看,聖經原則非常清楚,我們如何將神的恩典應用在對這方面有掙扎的弟兄姊妹們呢?對於在這方面有掙扎的信徒,什麼是信仰呢?什麼是跟隨耶穌?讓我們一起來看一下基督教信仰最基本的三合一真理。就是大家讀的那段經文:「 現在常存的有信、望、愛這三樣,其中最大的是愛。 」這就是人稱做基督教核心的三合一。我們先來看信。在我們的文化裡,特別是這一個時代、或某一個群體裡,當我們一想到信耶穌的話,祂就會將各樣的好處都賜給我們、一切的疾病祂都會醫、所有破裂的婚姻,祂都會重複癒合。但,當我們仔細看聖經的時候,好像看到另外一個圖畫。當我們要來跟隨祂的時候,耶穌說你們要背起你們的十字架來跟從我。對第一世紀的人來說,十字架只有一個意思,從來沒有人將十字架當裝飾品來戴的。因為十字架只有一個意思—「就是死!」如果您要信耶穌、如果您要跟隨耶穌的話,您要準備,您要跟祂一直到死!在彼得前書有這樣一段話,就是我們經常忽略的經文:「就是照著父神的預知蒙揀選,藉著聖靈得成聖潔,因而順服,並且被耶穌基督的血灑過的人。」這一些被神揀選的人,目的在那裡呢?在這裡彼得前書非常清楚的說:「因著聖靈,所以要順服。」就是一個要跟隨耶穌的人,是相信耶穌、就是順服耶穌的話語的人,當我們順服祂的時候,我們會跟隨著祂的腳步。在我們順服祂教導的時候,我們就越來越像耶穌。當我們在跟隨祂的時候,如果在我的生命裡,有這個同性吸引的狀況時,如果我遵守神的話語,我就要抗拒這一個需要,我要維持要單身,我要在性方面要緊緊的約束。

當然一講了這句話,我們的社會就會說,否定一個人性需要的話,這是何等殘酷的一件事。但是,好像聖經講得就不一樣,雖然我們的性向是我們人的那一部份,但是,不一定表答出來,然後您才能得到滿足?正如「吃」是我們人性的一部份,但是不是我人性的一部份,所以,我就沒有任何約束、限制的隨便吃?我想,生命不是這樣的。這是您的一部份,是您生命的一部份,但是,並不是您就要把它完全放縱出來。

然後我們再來看一下耶穌,我們都知道祂是單身的,我想這一些的話題在福音派教會裡,都不講的。在一些電影裡,我們會看見。但是,在我們討論都是不能討論的話題。耶穌是單身的,在希伯來書四章十五節:「祂像我們一樣,也曾在各方面受過試探,只是祂沒有犯罪。」如果我們將耶穌的人性,很重視的話,這裡所說的,我們受的試探,耶穌就受過。耶穌所受的試探,包括了權利、財富,也包括了性方面的試探。我們說,耶穌不會經過這些試探。當然,我們都有不同討論的結論,但是當我們看這段經文時,祂在各方面受過試探,但是祂沒有犯罪!

如果您是單身,為了要順服耶穌!您要對各方面性的引誘、試探要站立的穩。不可向這些試探低頭。如果您單身、又有同性吸引的話,您也要在試探當中站立的穩。如果您結婚了,您也要站立得穩,不能夠向周圍的試探低頭。那些異性的關係,婚外情、一夜情,您都要抗拒、站立得穩。這是每一個人,不論您是單身、或結了婚的,您遇到試探都要站立得穩。我知道在同性的吸引的事上,要抗拒試探是不容易的,我也知道是一件非常艱難的事。

我到今天還不能忘記在十七年前,我曾經住的那個城市,所發生的事。在一個禮拜六的早上,一個相當受尊敬的牧師,在自己的公寓裡自殺身亡。在那天早上,長老們開完會後,因為牧師沒有出席,所以長老們就去他的家裡,看看怎麼一回事。發現他死在他的廚房裡,他留了一張紙條,他說這一個掙扎太過強烈了,我無法再抗拒下去。我直到今天,我仍然記得這位牧師的面孔、他服事的教會。

讓我們從另外一個角度來看。我們都知道保羅,保羅在哥林多後書說,在他的身上有一根刺,然後他三次求神把這根「刺」挪掉,當然,有很多的推測這根「刺」是什麼?有人說是他的腸胃不好,也有人說他眼睛不好。但在哥林多後書十二章八到九節,如果我從另個角度試想一下,如果這一根刺,是一個同性吸引的話,會怎麼樣?神怎麼回答?祂說:「我的恩典是夠你用!因為我的能力在人的軟弱上顯得完全。」因為在我們破碎的裡面,有神的能力在幫助我們勝過我們的試探,幫助我們不向我們的試探低頭。我們要記得,我們不是受害者,乃是有神的力量、我們是一群得勝者!

在這三合一的組合裡的第二部份,叫「望」,有信還有望。對一些同性吸引的掙扎的人,有什麼盼望呢?有沒有一個密方?一吃了,照著做了,就得到完全的釋放?在這些問題裡,我們要小心,有一個極端,如果您真正的悔改的話,那神就會將您在這個性向裡完全、立刻的救出來,這是可能發生的事。但是,很少發生,另外一個極端,沒有辦法的,您生下來就是這樣,有這樣的基因,是沒有任何改變的盼望,您要接納它,因為是您的一部份,所以您要慶祝,要想辦法把它發揮出來,要滿足這樣一個傾向。

但是,聖經裡告訴我們,成聖是個一生的過程,像很多其他的罪,這個同性吸引的這件事,在我們活在這個世界上一天,我們可能永遠不會把它取掉的,一直等到有一天,我們見到耶穌基督,我們被祂改變了,能夠像祂一樣。是這樣的盼望,使我們對今天掙札、今日的痛苦,我們能夠比較容易的忍受一點。有一個人說:「關於這個狀況,最頭痛的是,就是當您往前面看的時候,看不見任何的結果及結局,它會繼續一天天的。但是如果您能記住神的允許,總有一天這個會終止,那會帶給您何等的安慰。」

雖然這樣說,但仍然有改變的希望。在剛才看的哥林多前書六章十一節:「你們有些人從前也是這樣的,但,現在藉著我們主耶穌基督的名,靠著我們神的靈,都已經洗淨了、聖潔了、稱義了。」你們從前,以前是這樣的生活,以前有同性戀行為,那是以前,但是,現在不一樣了!現在神拯救了您!這裡講有盼望的,您可能永遠改不了您的傾向,但您的行為可以改變。

有一本書叫做:「自由的圖案」。這裡講到十四位同性戀的人,他們從那裡的生活方式裡出來。對每一個人來說,都不是一夜之間發生的,是一個過程,但是,是有進步的,他們也沒有一下就完全沒有同性的吸引,他們說仍然有同性的吸引,對那些已經結了婚有了孩子的人,有人說仍有那個吸引,甚至有時是很強烈的,但是靠著神的恩典,我不需要向那些試探低頭了。

要產生這一類的改變,有一個很重要的關鍵:就是與同性和異性的人,建立一個很深刻、互相相愛、持久、和誠實的關係。要滿足這個人的需要,特別是尋求個人的身份的需要,在生命裡尋求一個完整的需要,在那裡可以得到滿足?在那裡可以得到這個答案?這就將我們帶到三合一的第三層份—就是「愛」!

在哪裡可以找到與人有一個深刻的、相愛的、持久的、誠實的關係?就是在教會裡。但是,在今日的教會裡,在這一方面做得並不好。我們給人不同的標誌、不同的稱號、不同的稱呼,他是同性戀的人、他是同志、「斷袖」、「斷臂」的,我們對待他們,就好像法利賽人對待長麻瘋病人一樣,我們怕、我們避免他們。會不會因為這個原因,很多同性戀的人一提到教會,所有的成見、偏見都浮出來了。

「愛」的意思,首先,我們要知道許多的同性戀的人,有同性吸引的人,他們不一定要完全對他們的狀況負責任。有些與先天有關的、有些與原生家庭有關的。但是,我們今天對這一件事沒有任何清楚的答案。對自己的狀況不一定要負責任,但對自己的行為要負責任。

「愛」的另外一個意思,我們真的不要參與那些對同性傾向的笑話、諷刺。我們對種族的諷刺已經越來越少了,當然還有。但我們對同性吸引的也是要避免一些話語。我們也要問一下自己,為什麼我對一個同性吸引的男、女的,有這樣強烈情緒的反應?是不是反應出自己內心有些事情要好好的對付、處理呢?

去「愛」,特別對同性吸引的人,我們要伸出我們的手跟他們握手,有機會我們要抱他們一下,要邀請他們來家裡吃飯,為他們禱告並和他們一起禱告,這是在神家裡該有的事。因為是在這樣的一個群體裡,我們首先經歷到神對我們每一個人的「愛」,因此,回應祂的這個愛,我們也要學習彼此的相愛。

 

結論:

在幾個月前, 鄰近一個大學的校園裡,每週五晚上有聚會,有五十多位參加,有一位年青人起來做見證,他與同學們分享,他在同性吸引事上的掙扎,他也知道同性的性行為是聖經中所禁止的,他拒絕放縱這個傾向。所以他邀請團契弟兄姊妹為他禱告。在這一些傾向、試探裡,他能站立的住、也需要督促他、好使他順服神的話語。

我非常佩服這位年青人!他可以能夠與契友同聊他內心深處的掙扎。我也佩服他,在年輕的時候,知道神的話語,也知道要順服神的重要。同時,我也非常欣賞那個團契,一方面彰顯出神的真理、一方面也彰顯出神的恩典!使那個團契,能為一個很安全的地方,是罪人都能來的地方,來到這裡能得到安全、感覺到愛。這樣的一個團契,使所有的人都能夠來尋求、經歷神的救贖和恩典,這是教會,這是神在地上的家庭。

在結束的時候,我想對我們當中有被同性吸引的弟兄姊妹們說一、二句話:如果這一個教會的牧師、教會團契的領導,在我們沈默中、或用的字句、語氣當中,使您感覺到在這個群體中,沒有被接納、被拒絕、甚至被感覺被定罪,內心充滿了羞恥,如果有這樣的情況,我覺得應該代表教會向您深深表答我們的歉意。我們要儘我們所能,來愛、接納神帶進群體的每一位,我們也儘我們所能的,來幫助每一位,在神的恩典、真理裡面繼續的成長。

 


Date:   01/23/2011

Text:   1 Corinthians 13:13 and selected texts

Title:    撥雲見日顯同性 Understanding Homosexuality

Theme: Since God has deeply love us, His followers are to learn how to love each other.

 

Introduction:

  As I was thinking about this message last year, I thought of a young man who was frustrated and struggling with his sexual identity. He felt attracted to people of the same sex but did not engage in those homosexual practices. He was not sure what to do with such feelings. He felt the church was silent on this matter that he and others like him were put into a special category, like the army: don’t ask, don’t tell. There was a part of him that was invisible in this church.

  I also think of individuals with similar struggles attracted to churches that are very warm and welcoming. They met people with similar persuasions. The ministers even offered to bless and officiate same sex unions.

  We often find churches either rejecting people with the same sex desires in order to maintain God’s righteous standard. Or to embrace and encourage to celebrate their same sex desires as a natural expression of how God made them. This morning I want to explore with you how we as a church can, and individually, to embrace God’s unchanging truth and also God’s grace.

  Since some 20 years ago, I began increasingly realize the issue about homosexuality that it is not about facts, theories, scientific data, but about people, real people. I think to most of us, homosexuality has a face to it, that is someone we know. As we discuss this topic, I’ll do my best to be faithful to God’s truth and be sensitive to human conditions.

I •  We are to understand the Basic premises in our discussion.

There are two categories of premise in this discussion.

The first category has to do with how we approach the scriptures. Under this category are two points. First, when we study any passage in the Bible, we should always try to understand both the writer’s intent and what the original audience heard. Then we ask: what does it mean to us today?

The second point is when we deal with different issues, such as, predestination, abortion, creation, divorce and homosexual issues, we are to first determine what is clearly written in the Bible. For example we know for certain that God created the heavens and the earth. Besides what is clear, are there areas the scripture is rather silent? For example, the scripture does not tell us that when Adam first opened his eyes, did he see a mature world, i.e. all the stars in the heaven and trees all fully grown? Or was it a primitive world, taking time for the lights of the stars to come to him, and the trees merely seedlings, slowly maturing. The scriptures are silent on this. In areas where the scripture is clear, we are to be firm. In areas where the scripture is silent, we should be cautious in making conclusions. Instead we are to leave room for discussion, and even agree to disagree.

The other category has to do with who we are.

  First, we’re all human beings made in God’s image. We are to separate a person from what a person does. In light of this, There is no such thing as homosexual, just like you don’t call another person heterosexual. Even though we may not like the homosexual practices, we cannot dehumanize those who practice them.

  Second, we are all sexual beings. When God created humans, he made us male and female. Angels are sexless and not human beings. Our sexuality is something very basic to our personhood. In addition to this, isn’t it true we all have a certain leaning? We don’t know why, but we all have an inclination because we’re all sexual beings.

  Third, we are all sinners. We are all weak and none of us are without sin. Every part of our humanity has been tainted by sin. We each carry our own unique marks of brokenness, constantly fighting our own sinful nature and none of us has conquered it all. If we are to be totally honest with ourselves, don’t we have to acknowledge that we are all sexual sinners? I don’t think anyone can say that Jesus'' teaching on lust does not apply to me. A Harvard Medical School professor said, “In God’s view, I suspect we are all sexual deviants.” We are all desperately in need of God’s grace. And none of us can read or listen to this sermon with a “holier-than-thou” attitude. Beginning with me, we all need to confess our particular sins to God/

  Lastly, we are all under the authority of God and His words. At HCC and many other churches, one of the tenants of our faith is that God’s word in the absolute standard of our faith and conduct.

II •  We are to be clear on Biblical prohibitions.

In the Bible, there are 4 passages that deals with homosexuality.

First, Genesis 13:13, “ 在耶和華看來,所多瑪人是罪大惡極的。 ” 18:20,21, “ 20 耶和華說:“控告所多瑪和蛾摩拉的聲音甚大,他們的罪惡極重。 21 我現在要下去,看看他們所行的, ” So God went down to investigate. In the end, 19:24-25, “ 24 當時,耶和華就使硫磺與火,從天上耶和華那裡降與所多瑪和蛾摩拉; 25 把那些城和全平原,以及城中所有的居民,連地上生長的,都毀滅了。 ” This was an act of judgment. What was their sin?

Genesis 19:5, “ 5 他們呼喚羅得,對他說:“今晚到你這裡來的人在哪裡?把他們帶出來,我們要與他們同房 ” the word know can have several meanings in Hebrew. From Genesis 4:1, a commonly used meaning is having sex. Then Jude 7, further clarifies its meaning, “ 7 又像所多瑪、蛾摩拉和周圍城市的人,與他們一樣的淫亂,隨從反常的情慾,以致遭受永火的刑罰,成了後世的鑒戒。 ,” The sin of Sodom and Gomorrah was homosexual practices.

Secondly, Leviticus passages. Lev. 18:22, “ 22 你不可與男人同睡交合,像與女人同睡交合一樣,這是可憎的事。 ” 20:13, “ 13 如果有人與男人同睡,像與女人同睡一樣,他們二人行了可憎的事, ” the Leviticus passage is clear in God’s prohibition of homosexual intercourse of every kind.

Thirdly, Paul’s writings. In Romans 1:26-27, “ 26 因此, 神就任憑他們放縱可恥的情慾:他們的女人把原來的性的功能,變成違反自然的功能; 27 同樣地,男人也捨棄了女人原來的性功能,彼此慾火攻心,男人與男人作出可恥的事。 ” In this passage, Paul talked about the desire and then the behavior. Their behavior of same sex, sexual practices.

Then the passage in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, 1 Timothy 1:8-11 are a listing of sins committed by men. Among them, “ 9 你們不知道不義的人不能承受 神的國嗎?不要自欺,無論是行淫亂的、拜偶像的、姦淫的、作孌童的、親男色的、 10 偷竊的、貪心的、醉酒的、 From these passages, it is clear that homosexual practices are prohibited in God’s word. Because of time, I cannot go into all the arguments against what is clearly written.

Having said this, how can we apply God’s grace to individuals who are struggling in this area? What does it mean to be a believer while struggling in such issues?

III •  We are to acknowledge God’s grace to all.

I like for us to take a look at the triads of Christian faith: Faith, Hope and Love. Let’s begin with faith. In our culture, even among the Christians, we often hear that when we believe in Jesus, he will bless us with all kinds of good things. Our diseases will be healed and broken marriages restored. Yet God’s word seems to tell us something different. When we come to follow him, we have to take up our cross and follow him. For the 1 st century believers, the cross meant only one thing: death. When one follows Christ, one must be prepared to die for him. In 1 st Peter 1:2, we also read, “ 2 就是照著父 神的預知蒙揀選,藉著聖靈得成聖潔,因而順服,並且被耶穌基督的血灑過的人。 ” Why are we being called? For obedience to Jesus Christ. To be a Christian is to be obedient to him, to be obedient to his words. As we are obedient to Him, follow his instructions, we’ll become more like him. As we obey him, if we have the same sex orientation, the alternative to heterosexual marriage is to remain single and practice sexual abstinence.

Our society will say, how cruel it is to deny a person’s sexual fulfillment. But God’s word says something different. While sexuality is a part of who we are, we don’t need to be sexually active in order to be fulfilled. Eating is a part of us and it doesn’t mean that we are to do away with our restrictions. Look at Jesus. He was single, he was tempted in every way (Hebrew 4:15) as we are, but he did not sin. When we take Jesus' humanity seriously, even though He is God, yet He was in every way human, this temptation will include power, sex and wealth. He was tempted just like us, but he did not sin.

If you are a single person, in order to be obedient to Christ you have to stand firm against the various sexual temptations. If you are a single with same sex desires, you too need to stand firm and not yield to those sexual temptations. If you are married, you too are not to yield to those sexual temptations that will lead to extra-marital sexual relations that can ruin your marriage.

We know it is difficult. I can still remember 17 years ago when a well-known pastor in my former city committed suicide on a Saturday morning. The elders of his church found a suicide note: the struggle is too intense and I just can’t resist it anymore. To this day I still remember his face and his ministry.

Remember Paul? He said he had a thorn on his side and 3 times asked God to remove it. Have you ever wondered, what if this is a same sex desire? God did not listen to him to remove it. Instead, God said, 2 Corinthians 12:8-9, “ 8 為了這事,我曾經三次求主,使這根刺離開我。 9 他卻對我說:“我的恩典是夠你用的,因為我的能力在人的軟弱上顯得完全。”所以,我更喜歡誇自己的軟弱,好讓基督的能力臨到我的身上。 ” In our weaknesses and brokenness, there is God’s power that will enable us to overcome those temptations, no matter how strong they are. It is important to remember we are not victims, but with God’s power, we are victors.

Second, Hope. What kind of hope is there for change for one struggling with same sex desire? Is there a cure, is there healing? Can they change? I feel we have to be careful on this. One extreme is that if there is a true repentance, then one will be healed of this same sex desire immediately. Although it is possible it rarely happens. Another extreme is that there is no cure, no hope of change, and you just have to accept it and fully express this desire.

The scripture tells us that sanctification is a life long process. Like many other sins, we may never completely rid ourselves of the same sex desires until we see Christ and are transformed into his likeness. But this hope will make our present day suffering bearable. A person writes, “one of the most wretched things about this condition is that when you look ahead, there seems to be no limit to it. it will just continue on and on. But to remember God’s promise that one day this will all come to an end, is a great comfort.”

However, there is hope to change. In the 1 Corinthian passage that included homosexual behaviors, we noticed the words, “you were”. You were living a homosexual life style, but not anymore. Why? Because of God’s grace and power. In the book, Portraits of Freedom, are testimonies of 14 believers who came out of that life-style. Many of them are happily and heterosexually married. For all of them, it did not happen overnight. It was a process, but it was progress. Did they rid their same sex desires? Many of them shared that it was still there, but with God’s grace they would not yield to them.

One of the keys to change is the development of deep, loving, lasting and honest friendships, both with the members of the same and opposite sex. To fulfill the needs to seek one’s true identity and longing for completeness. Where can we find this? This leads to the 3 rd triad of our Christian faith:

Love. Where can one find a place where one can develop deep, loving, lasting and honest friendship? The church. But we don’t do it well at all. We label people; he is divorced, he or she is a gay or lesbian. We treat them the same way the Pharisees treated the lepers. We are afraid of and avoid them.

To love means that we need to know many of the homosexuals (there is still a lot of discussions on this) are not solely responsible for their conditions. Yes, there are times family upbringing may be a cause, but not always. They may not be responsible for their desires but they are responsible for their behaviors.

To love means that we are to stop and not to participate in those jokes that demean a gay or lesbian; just as we should not engage in those racial jokes. We should ask ourselves why do we react so emotionally to the gays and lesbians. Are there any issues we have to deal with?

To love means we are to embrace, eat with, hug and pray for a man or woman with such same sex feelings. This is what should be happening in God’s family. It is a community that has first experienced God’s love and now, in response to this, we are to love one another.

Conclusion:

  Few months ago, on a college campus, a group of 50 students held a meeting. A young man shared his Christian faith. He also shared his struggles with same sex desire. He knew that homosexual practices are clearly forbidden in the Bible and refused to give in to such a desire. So he asked the group to pray for him and to hold him accountable that in the midst of those desires, he would be obedient to God and not yield to temptations.

  I admire this young man for his courage to share with his peers the struggle within him. I admire his obedience to God’s truth. At the same time I also appreciate the fellowship group for demonstrating Truth and Grace. Making it a safe place for sinners of all kinds. So that we can all come to seek and experience God’s redemptive grace. This is church, God’s family on earth. .

  In closing I would like to say a few words to those who are struggling in this area. If the pastors and this church, in our silence or words, had made you feel rejected and condemned, I ask for your forgiveness. We’ll do our best to love and accept everyone God has brought into this community. We’ll do our best to help everyone to grow in God’s grace and love.

 




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